SHE-POWER Fiction: Samantha Says

by Kelly on November 10, 2008 · 20 comments

in Creativity. Writing. Blogging,Kelly's Fiction


The new barman’s been giving me the eye all night. He’s tall with defined biceps and straight shoulders, but he’s not my type really. Way too clean cut, and he’s a barmen for fucks sake. What can he possibly have to offer me?

My head feels heavy from the weight of too many tequilas. The coke buzz has long worn off and I’m sliding big time. My fight with Eliza is still hovering at the back of my mind, and every time I picture her draping herself over that greasy wog I feel sick and a white rage furls up inside. Time for another.

“Hey, can I get some service over here?“

I wave a twenty dollar bill at the cute barman and he excuses himself from his chat with a sycophantic female patron and comes over.

“What’ll it be?“

He has warm eyes, dark chocolate brown and lovely defined eyebrows with long lashes. Quite sexy come to think of it.

I run my inspection down over his broad chest and flat stomach in the tight white tee and change my mind about the tequila. I scrunch the twenty into my hand and give him a small smile.

“What time do you get off?”

He looks surprised, but pleased.“Why you asking?”

I watch his hands as he absently wipes down the bar. Mmm, strong, slightly veiny. Long fingers. Promising. I lean right into the bar and clench my arms to my side to beef up my cleavage. Not that it needs it, mind you. I have playboy breasts and they’re real. Thank god, Eliza was good for something. Can’t fault her genes.

“Why do you think?”

He blushes and I actually find it endearing. He searches for something to say but seems lost. I decide to put him out of his misery. I reach out and trace the grooves of the beer tray with a fingernail, not taking my eyes off him.

“Look, I’m not really one to play games. Are you interested or not?” I stare at him boldly.

He looks down and then gives a nervous laugh.

“You don’t mince your words at all, do you?“

“What would be the point of that?”

He stops wiping and drops the dishrag, bracing himself against the bar, leaning in a little closer.

“Some would say a bit of wordplay adds to the romance.”

I lean in and whisper near his ear.

“I’m not looking for romance. I’m just looking to get laid.”

He shakes his head sorrowfully. “That’s a shame then,” he pushes away from the bar. “Cause I’m not your man.“

It takes me a moment to process the rejection.

“Come on, you’re not interested?”

“I didn’t say that.”

“So, what’s the problem?”

“You don’t even know my name.”

I smirk. “An old fashioned guy – how sweet. So, tell me your name if that makes you feel better.”

He eyes the other bartender a few feet away and lowers his voice.

“Look, I’m past that whole one night stand thing. I was kinda hoping to take you out some time.“

Then, cute smile. Lovely straight teeth.

I sigh. Too bad, he would have been good. I tug my jacket off the back of the bar stool and slip it on.

“Sorry, but I don’t date.“

He laughs, and it’s a deep timbre sound. Warm and lifting.

“What do you mean, you don’t date?”

“Just forget it.“ I sling my bag over my shoulder. “I’ll see ya.“

“Hey, don’t go…”

I push my way through the crowd dancing to some shit Indie band. What a drag. Now I have to go home alone. I’m not in the mood. What a shit day this has been. Inexplicably, I feel tears prick behind my eyes and I blink them back. I don’t cry. I never cry.

I still can’t believe he said he wanted to date. Jesus, does anybody date these days? I briefly think of Bryce. Sometimes I still miss him. It’s been years now but the pain is still raw.

Dating. No longer my thing.

Photo by margot.capespine

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{ 20 comments… read them below or add one }

1 victoria 11.10.08 at 3:02 pm

wow. emma bovary. tragic and lovely, all at the same time.

victoria’s last blog post..tripping down memory lane

2 Kelly 11.10.08 at 5:30 pm

Wow, high praise there. I’m blushing. Thank you :)


3 BC Doan 11.10.08 at 9:53 pm

Thoroughly enjoy this! I love how she is so bold, and said what she wants. Truly refreshing! I was hoping also that the bartender goes after her..

4 Dot 11.11.08 at 1:18 am

She’s a tough one! This was very gritty and real.

Dot’s last blog post..The “Thing Conspiracy”

5 Urban Panther 11.11.08 at 3:33 am

What’s a wog? Doesn’t sound nice, and a greasy one to boot! Hmmm….acronym for White Opinionated Git? *smile*

Urban Panther’s last blog post..Not so mundane after all

6 Vered - MomGrind 11.11.08 at 7:08 am

I loved it too, Kel.

How is your book coming along? Are you writing a few pages each day? I really want to see you getting published.

Vered – MomGrind’s last blog post..Ugliest Shoes EVER

7 Kelly 11.11.08 at 7:37 am

Thanks for the feedback everyone. And UP, a ‘wog’ is what an Australian racist term for someone of Mediterranean or Eastern European appearance. It’s not nice and not a word I would use, but Samantha did so it’s in there.

Vered, the book is at a stand still to be honest while I’m evaluating where I want to focus my energies for the moment. In a bit of a flux about life right now. Not in a bad way, but looking at a number of options for what to do with my limited ME time. I am writing, but more short pieces because that pretty much seems to be my attention span right now.


8 Marelisa 11.11.08 at 3:01 pm

Ouch, you could feel her reeling back from the rejection. And thanks for the Australian dialect lesson :-)

Marelisa’s last blog post..100 Essential Life Lessons

9 Kelly 11.11.08 at 10:22 pm

Happy to help. Speaking Australian can be a whole other language :)


10 Jenny Mannion 11.11.08 at 11:26 pm

Wow Kelly, Your writing never ceases to amaze me! How you develop the characters and have me hooked on the story in the first paragraph is amazing! I felt so many emotions reading this short piece – bravo! More more more! :-) Love, Jenny

Jenny Mannion’s last blog post..The “Paging Me System” — A Method to Heal Pain Naturally

11 Betsy 11.12.08 at 12:15 am

Man, what will-power! Heh. I was so hoping she’d make an exception! Can you make her go back the next night and reconsider? :) My first visit and I’m full of anticipation!

Betsy’s last blog post..DESTINATIONS

12 Karl Staib - Work Happy Now 11.12.08 at 12:27 am

Nice ending. I wasn’t expecting it and that’s the best part of a good story. A twist that makes you take a second look at the characters.

Karl Staib – Work Happy Now’s last blog post..55 Tips to Make Work More Fun

13 Jannie 11.12.08 at 3:33 am

Boy, does this bring back memories of The Olde Single Days.

Tequila sure can talk, can’t it??

Jannie’s last blog post..Endometriosis sucks

14 Davina 11.12.08 at 6:44 am

Hi Kelly. This was great! I lost all track of time as your words carried me through this “encounter”. I have new faith in barmen! :-)

Davina’s last blog post..Akemi Gaines On Intuition, Dreams And Spiritual Guidance–Interview Part 2

15 Kelly 11.12.08 at 4:06 pm

Thank you for the praise. A writer’s ego always needs a good massage!

Welcome to SHE-POWER! Thanks so much for stopping by to say hello. Glad you liked this, and there could be a bit of life in Samantha’s story yet. I’ll have to see :)

@Karl Staib
Welcome and thanks for commenting! The ending actually surprised me. I didn’t know there was a dark man in her past until bang, there he was :)

Another newcomer – how exciting. Welcome! Yes, tequila has led me down many interesting paths over the years, and even had a huge impact of my wedding. See

I’ve always had a soft spot for barmen. One could say at one point in my life, my barman obsession was almost a fetish!


16 Maya 11.14.08 at 3:30 am

I like her! Raw and very real!
Nice character you got there Kelly!

Are you getting published??? Way to go. Be sure to let us know :)

Maya’s last blog post..Are you a storyteller? What is your story?

17 Kelly 11.14.08 at 6:43 am

I haven’t tried to get published yet. My novel has gone through two drafts and this year I was supposed to finish the third, but got waylaid with family commitments and this blog. I’m assessing now how to devote more time and energy to getting it finished so I can try to get myself an agent and publisher.

Kelly :)

18 Cath Lawson 11.18.08 at 10:10 pm

Hi Kelly – this was excellent. The woman came over as masculine somehow. I don’t think she would be the type of person I would warm to in real life.

Cath Lawson’s last blog post..Do You Have Business Questions?

19 Kelly 11.18.08 at 10:53 pm

I think she may come across as masculine because she’s a hard nut and a ball breaker. But she has me curious about what’s underneath that so I’m actually going to do some more work with her.


20 Steve Millikin 05.19.09 at 6:54 pm

Oh that’s hot. How tragic her past experiences must have been. Don’t do dates…just a hot quick ride and back to emancipation

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